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The First Annual Rugby Pass End Of The Southern Hemisphere Season Awards

By Jamie Wall
Beauden Barrett

As the curtain falls on another Southern Hemisphere rugby season, official adjudicator Jamie Wall reveals the winners and losers of the 2016 Rugby Pass End Of The Southern Hemisphere Season Awards.

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Player Of The Season: Beauden Barrett (Hurricanes, All Blacks)
This one wasn’t that hard to call; after all Barrett has already scooped World Rugby Player of the Year for 2016. His ascent from a guy who everyone thought would spend his career on the bench to the first player picked certainly has been fun to watch, but what makes it more astounding is that he did it while having the goal kicking form of someone who just stumbled out of the pub at 3am every other week. It’s no surprise that he’s heavily involved in the next award…

Try of the Season: Willis Halaholo (Hurricanes)
The Hurricanes lost two decades of experience in the midfield with the departure of Ma’a Nonu and Conrad Smith at the end of last season. The iconic duo were replaced with a revolving door of handy provincial players, and Halaholo was one of them. Here he benefits from the brilliance of Barrett to finish off a stunning long range effort against the Chiefs.

Mouth From the South Award: Michael Cheika (Waratahs, Australia) (returning champion)
The opinionated coach has unfortunately been the main headline for the underperforming Wallabies this year. Referees have mainly been the target of his spite, but he also doesn’t think much of the New Zealand media after they mockingly portrayed him as a clown.

Line Break of the Season: Vaea Fifita (Wellington)
Awesomely dangerous. If Fifita had got this wrong, we’d be having an award for Piers Francis being the first man to have his head kicked off in a rugby game.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qnqgv5pkGCI

Most Accurate Representation of Your National Team’s Upcoming Season: Bulls
This is what it feels like to be a South African rugby fan right now.

Highest Dose of Cement in the Bloodstream: Dane Coles (Hurricanes, All Blacks)
Played the Super Rugby final and held the trophy aloft with broken ribs. Was supposed to watch the Bledisloe Cup match two weeks later from the bench, but got called on after four minutes, still with said ribs broken. Legend.

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The ‘2016 Should Have Been Our Year’ Award: Lions
This truly has been the year of the underdog: Leicester City, Chicago Cubs, Cronulla Sharks and, sadly, Donald Trump. While the Hurricanes’ Super Rugby triumph was sort of a surprise, it really should’ve been their opponents that had their name in lights given that their entire history up until this year has been more or less a complete travesty.

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Biggest Disappointment: Jaguares
Predicted by some to win Super Rugby in their first ever season, the Jags ended up being a pale imitation of Los Pumas (which is what they essentially were just in different jerseys). At the mercy of a national agenda that limited selections, the fact that they occasionally managed to look like a million bucks made their existence all the more frustrating.

The Inaugural Aaron Smith Award For Career-Limiting Behaviour: Aaron Smith (Highlanders, All Blacks)
During the Super Rugby playoffs Smith had the rare distinction of being the first player in rugby history to make a ref change his mind. With the world at his feet, it all came crashing down in a disabled toilet at Christchurch airport. The ensuing media circus put New Zealand’s repressed sexual culture in the spotlight, and affected the halfback so much he was a shadow of himself on the end of year tour.

Spirit of Sportsmanship: All Blacks / Wallabies / Springboks
The honours are shared between the big three Southern Hemisphere nations for their efforts to raise hope in the north – much needed after last year’s calamitous Rugby World Cup in which not a single European made the semifinals. This season the Wallabies allowed England to regain a great deal of dignity during their series whitewash in June, while the mighty All Blacks gave the Irish a reason to rejoice for the first time in 111 years. Meanwhile the Springboks have been sharing the love openly and freely to basically anyone who arranges a game with them.

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