'With England, some things were good, and some things weren’t so good'

Former England fly-half Charlie Hodgson, one of the most gifted footballers of his generation, has launched his latest coaching programme aimed at mentoring budding young professional players and building their mental resilience.

The Rugby Buddy Mindset Academy is an online course designed for 14-18-year-old players who aspire to follow in the footsteps of Hodgson, who had a 16-year career at the top and won 38 caps for England.

The Yorkshireman would have undoubtedly made more Test appearances had he not been around at the same time as Jonny Wilkinson, nor been racked by self-doubt and anxiety when he did get a chance.

Hodgson has recognised the traits that, at times, held him back or stopped him from enjoying the moment, and now hopes his experience can be put to good use and help others avoid the same mental traps.

“With England, some things were good, and some things weren’t so good,” he said.

“Unfortunately, it was never one of those environments that I felt comfortable in; I always felt on edge, and I never felt like I could really deliver my best, and that’s down to pressure.

“I always had that nagging feeling that I was perhaps not good enough, a feeling that I was just filling the shirt until Jonny (Wilkinson) got back.

“Sometimes the anxiety would manifest itself in my goal-kicking. I’d be on the pitch looking up at the posts and it felt like they were shrinking and shrinking. It’s not a nice feeling.”

Hodgson was a brilliant playmaker for Sale Sharks, a fine facilitator with ball in hand who brought the best out of an exciting back three of Jason Robinson, Mark Cueto, and Steve Hanley.

After playing a massive role in the club’s only Premiership title win in 2006, Hodgson parted company with the club a few years later and joined Saracens, where he collected more winners’ medals.

With England, though, there was always a sense of ‘what might have been’, and the 44-year-old admits there are still frustrations to this day.

“Of the three World Cups that I missed, I’d say 2007 was the most frustrating, and one I still have some issues with now,” he recalled.

“I was made to join up with the pre-tournament SBS (Special Boat Service) training camp the day after I got married. I did the camp, and still didn’t get picked at the end of it. In hindsight, I think it could have been handled better.

“I chose not to reflect on my England career for a good while, but I’ve started to do that lately, and obviously I am proud to have played for my country 38 times and represented the British & Irish Lions (in 2005).

“I’m at a place now where I can see all the positives that came out of it.

“Scoring a record 44 points in a 134-0 win on debut against Romania was a lovely moment. I couldn’t have asked for more for my first cap to be fair, and it’s one of those matches that will probably go down in history because of the scoreline. I think it’s incredible that we managed to rack up that many points.

“My performance against South Africa in the Autumn of 2004 is another that people seem to remember. I scored under the posts and just had one of those games where everything seemed to click. Twickenham was rocking.”

Hodgson now derives satisfaction from helping those he works with to deal with the challenges that’ll come their way far better than he was able to do.

“I have done a number of things since finishing playing, including some kicking coaching at Wigan RL. I then entered the corporate world, but I’d had enough of it; it was destroying me mentally and physically. Now, I have my own coaching and mentoring venture, Rugby Buddy,” he said.

“It’s been a long journey of figuring things out, getting things wrong, being pretty low, and then finding something else and realising that’s not good enough. It’s been a voyage of exploration, and I feel I’ve reached the stage where I am content.

“I always wanted to give back to rugby, and I feel that’s what I’m doing now by helping young, aspirational professional players navigate the tough times that they’ll inevitably come across.

“I recognised a need to support players on the pathway. It required a mindset shift for me to overcome anxiety and self-doubt. It was tough, but luckily I was able to do that. It came with time and experience. And if I can prepare young players for those moments before they arrive, then I’d like to think that’s a positive thing.”