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A seemingly innocuous upload to an All Blacks “Banter” page on Facebook has highlighted just how many Kiwis have been guilty of Haka Crimes over the years.
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While it’s hardly Gangnam Style (yet), the video of a group of Kiwi mates earning their Lindauer at a friend’s wedding has already been watched 20,000 times today, with hundreds of friends tagged for their own #HakaCrimes.
Yes, we all know one – that Kiwi mate, excited to be away from home and high on life, who gets the call-up on stage and gives their all for Queen and Country.
The atmosphere down at Clapham Walkabout is electric. 15 of us doing the haka in rasta wigs to Kings of Leon #jubilee
— Completeledge (@Fuckingledge) June 3, 2012
Even celebrities aren’t immune from #HakaCrimes. Twitter went into overdrive on Sunday when boxer Tyson Furey participated in what many are calling the “worst haka ever” with WBO Champion, Kiwi Sonny Parker.
Unfortunately, as in the case depicted, most of these impromptu performances result in what can only be described as #HakaCrimes for their bastardisation of that holy pre-match challenge. In today’s Facebook post, there appear to be hundreds of guilty parties lurking in the shadows of post-OE normal life (shout out to you, Leon and Campbell):
The phenomenon of #HakaCrimes is most prevalent away from home soil (Shepherd’s Bush in London has certainly seen her fair share of action), where whole groups of young Kiwi men have deluded themselves into thinking they could out-Haka the likes of Weepu, Meeuws or Lomu.
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Weddings have also been popular occasions for an impromptu amateur war dance, as seen in this actual viral video from 2016.
We know from these comments that there are many more wonderful videos and photos out there, so please, if you or one of your friends is guilty of #HakaCrimes, send your videos to contact@rugbypass.com or share in the comments below or on Twitter @RugbyPass.
Comments on RugbyPass
Those who saw Sharks vs Clermont and Ox N'Che vs Rabah Slimani should have a good idea of the best scrumagers… May be not the best props…
2 Go to commentsIt's been an unusual era of unpopular, highly competitive, domineering, fairly big fly halves in the home nations with Farrell, Sexton and Biggar. Russell is different in personality and player I think. I'd rank Sexton first of the three because he is just as good a game controller but also has a great passing game. And his competitiveness never seems to cause problems with refs.
31 Go to commentsThank goodness he wasn't born in Scotland, he'd have been a great candidate for the Scottish Barbarians. I wouldn't put it past them to push for a “where the player was conceived” rule 😂
1 Go to commentsOwen Farrell is one of the most polarising figures in the game. His entire attitude on the field (and sometimes off of it) smacks of arrogance and he is about as brash as Donald Trump in a political debate. Yet behind that facade is a calculating, determined and powerful leader who drives any team forward with an Iron will. You are right in that he gets better in the heat of battle and in the face of overwhelming odds. He develops a narrow focus and he delivers his best in a way that few others can. He is one of Englands great performers who sacrificed alot for the team and who often bears the weight of responsibility of leadership alone on the field and in front of the media. Despite what many think of him he is a fantastic game manager with a good rugby brain. He will be sorely missed from the international stage
31 Go to commentsAlways proud of the effort, Sam. The All blacks never stop fighting, never just roll over. He didn’t get anywhere near the respect he earned, but that’s due to results, not commitment to the cause. Have fun dominating in Japan!
1 Go to commentsNot sure why Papali’i thinks Scott Robertson needs his help to select the next All Black Captain. In my view, Papali’i would be well advised to have a good hard look at his own game, and to reflect on how fortunate he is to even wear the black jersey. Rather than shouting at his team mates at every set piece, standing in the mid-field pointing and holding his arms out and flopping to the ground at the back of every second or third ruck, may I suggest he would be far better employed actually doing something on the field. Seriously, watch him for 10 minutes during a game - not much happens. When was the last time he was first to a breakdown, or actually made a turnover? If Robertson is half the Coach I think he is, Papali’i will not be anywhere near the AB’s this season.
11 Go to commentsHiding coming up for Saders.
1 Go to commentsDagg really does go down some rabbit holes doesnt he? In the name I guess.
6 Go to commentsHey Brett I’m one who is looking forward to seeing JS back on the rugby field. I was under the impression that a large portion of his contract was via a third party so RA isn’t having to foot the bill My big concern is around the Tahs and what is happening there, why are so many players bailing. Is it the program, the coaches or the culture. Joe Schmidt recently said he had been at the Tahs all week and DC is a good coach. Something doesn’t gel , 10 front row forwards in a season that’s not bad luck
14 Go to commentsIncorrect title. He hasn’t said Furlong is one of the best scrummagers. He said he is one of the best props.
2 Go to comments“_It seems like a crazy thing that he was counting them_“ Are you stupid, mate? Anyone with more than half a brain understands that he meant “a lot” or something similar. Do you really think he was counting? “*Goode*: Told you, Jim!“ No, you banana. You said, explicitly, that the Irish players didn’t say what EE said they did. Even though you weren’t there. Even though you didn’t hear a word they said. M0r0n.
110 Go to commentsI am sure that Scott Robertson did do the courtesy of telling Sam Cane that he was not in his All Black plans and NZR would support him if he wished to sign a lucrative pension playing out his career in the cream puff rugby that is Japan’s Top League. I fail to see this as a negative as Israel Dagg is trying to spin it. Razor allowed Cane to leave with dignity rather than being unceremoniously dumped as was Buck Shelford.
6 Go to commentsHey rugbypass can I also get involved with writing rugby articles?
1 Go to commentsHey rugbypass can I also get involved with writing rugby articles?
1 Go to commentsAT THE END OF THE DAY THE TEAM WITH 4 WORLD CUPS WILL ALWAYS GET TO TELL THE OTHER NATION TO SUCK MY BALLS. THIS IS A SCIENTIFIC AND IRREFUTABLE FACT.
110 Go to commentsWish him and his family the best in his retirement from International rugby and into the future.
1 Go to commentsSelf proclaimed expert/pundit Andy Goode and his very personal views on referees…Why recalling them in such an article as if he were an undisputed authority on the subject ? Only because fellow writer ?
1 Go to commentsLate growth spurts are a common problem over here. I’m well over 30, and I just started having a growth spurt too. Could be a world class prop soon.
1 Go to commentsas much as the challenge cup is a bit of a nothing competition, winning it would still mean something. last year it was won by toulon, who are now something like 4th in the top 14? The year before it was won by Lyon a season before they finished 3rd in the league. The year before that the final was contested by Montpellier and Leicester - 12 months before they both became domestic champions. That should give Gloucester fans some hope.
1 Go to commentsgreat article - although I can’t help wonder whether the more relevant debate over coming years will be between Ford and Fin Smith!
31 Go to comments