'I thought it would be 'mate, f*** off, the door's f*****g closed for you now'
Joe Marler has urged the British and Irish Lions to add a specialist counsellor to their touring party for South Africa to help players and staff cope with an extended spell in their bubble environment.
Including next month’s training camp in Jersey and quarantine on return, the Lions will be away from home for over two months in an itinerary that culminates in a three-Test series against the world champions.
Warren Gatland has highlighted the importance of looking after the players’ wellbeing and Marler, who was overlooked for the tour, believes a squad therapist would be invaluable.
The England prop has spoken openly of his battle with depression and on Wednesday Sky Sports will screen his documentary ‘Big Boys Don’t Cry’, which explores ways in which poor mental health can be managed.
“Maybe it would be worth taking an extra member of staff who is suited in that sphere. I think that would be a very good idea,” said Marler, a Lions tourist in 2017.
“And if they’re not going to take someone qualified, then they definitely need to have a conversation as a whole touring party at the start.
“Lions tours are tough enough as they are, being away from your families, but this one is in particular.
“You could nominate guys to be available to check in with for a chat, but players have got games to think about.
“Off the top of my head, there have been a couple of sports psychologists on tours but they tend to be focussed around the performance side of things. They’re not qualified in the clinical side.”
Marler has praised the responses of England head coach Eddie Jones and former Harlequins head of rugby Paul Gustard when discussing his mental health struggle with them.
The 30-year-old was selected for Jones’ most recent Six Nations squad but withdrew to be with his pregnant wife Daisy rather than stay in the squad’s bubble.
In 2016 he ruled himself out of the tour to Australia and two years later he announced his international retirement only to reverse the decision and take part in the 2019 World Cup.
“Paul Gustard was a big factor in helping me get out and get help when I had my meltdown, and he was a big driver in trying to find someone independent to help me. I’ll always be grateful to him for how receptive he was,” Marler said.
“Back in 2016 when I first stepped away from the England set-up and I remember sitting down and having a conversation with Eddie in Brighton, and seeing that sort of human side to him in understanding where I was at, that was massive.
“And then seeing it again in 2018, when I stepped away again, was also massive in that he understood and was there to be like ‘look, what can I do to help, can we get anyone involved to help you?’ He has always been massively receptive when I have spoken to him about it.
“That’s huge, especially when I had an opinion of him – prior to opening up to him – of this hard-core, in-your-face, take-no-s**t…
“He would probably have been the last person I’d think of to understand that actually I need some time away to work out what’s going on here.
“I thought that would be it, that it would be ‘mate, f**k off, the door’s f*****g closed for you now, f**k!’
“That’s exactly how I thought it was going to be, but to see that human side to him meant a lot to me.”
* Watch Joe Marler in ‘Big Boys Don’t Cry’ on Sky Sports Arena and NOW at 4pm on Wednesday 12th May, and throughout the week on multiple Sky Sports channels.
Comments on RugbyPass
Pretty good side. Scott Barrett should be the captain. Ethan Blackadder a great choice at blindside. He is going to go from strength to strength having made a couple of starts for the Crusaders. Scott Robertson rates him highly. Perenara could start a no 9.
3 Go to commentsI question and with respect. Was enough done over the last few years to bring through new blood knowing the Whitelocks and co couldn’t last forever. There should have been more done to future proof the team. New squad new coach, he and they weren’t set up well. IMO
6 Go to commentsJacobsen will definitely be in the 23
3 Go to commentsLots of discussion points, Ben, but two glaring follies IMO: 1. Blackadder at 6. Has done nothing so far this season to justify his selection. Did you see him going backwards in contact at the weekend? Simply has not got the physical presence at 6: we need a Scott Barrett or a Finau (or wildcard Ah Kuoi), beasts who are big enough to play lock, like Frizzell. If Barret played at 6, Paddy could be joined at lock by Vai’i or one of the young giants we need to promote, like Darry or Lord (if he ever gets on the field). Blackadder best left to join the queue for 7. 2. Not even a mention for Christie? Ratima gets caught at crucial times at the back of the ruck when he hesitates on the pass. The only way he starts would be if Christie and TJ are injured.
3 Go to commentsWhat a dagg in more ways than one
6 Go to commentsRegroup come back next year but sack some of the coaching team and don't be like the ABs last minute sacking. If Crusaders don't do well ABs don't do well.
5 Go to commentsProctor Definitely inform again this year had a hell of a season last year and this year is looking even better. Still mixed feelings about Ioane tho.
4 Go to commentsDagg is still trying to get enough headlines to make himself relevant enough to get a job. The Crusaders went back to square one at all levels. Shelve this season and nail the next one.
6 Go to commentsHe was in such great form. Sad for him but only a short term injury and it will be great to see him back for the finals.
1 Go to commentsAfter their 5/0 start, I had the Crusaders to finish Top 4 only…they lost the plot in Perth but will reload and back themselves vs 4th placed Rebels…
5 Go to commentsBoth nations missed a great opportunity to book a game that would have had a lot of interest from around the world. I understand these games can’t be organised in 5 minutes but they should have found a way to make it happen. I don’t think Wales are ducking anyone but it’s a bad look haha.
3 Go to commentsIt will be fascinating to see the effect that Jo Yapp has. If they can compete with Canada and give BFs a run for their money that will be progress
1 Go to commentsFollowing his dream and putting in the work. Go well young fella!
3 Go to commentsPerhaps filling Twickenham is one of Mitchell’s KPIs. I doubt whether both September matches will be at Twickenham on consecutive weekends. I would take the BF one to a large provincial stadium so as not to give them the advantage and experience of playing at Twickenham before a large crowd prior to the RWC.
3 Go to commentsvery unfortunate for Kitshoff, but big opportunity potentially for Nché to prove he is genuinely the best loosehead in the world, rather than just a specialist finisher. Presuming that if Kitshoff is out, it will also give Steenekamp a chance to come into the 23? Or are others likely to be ahead of him?
1 Go to commentsA long held question in popular culture asks if art imitates life or does the latter influence the former? Over this 6 nations I can ask the same question of the media influencing the thoughts of its audience or vice versa. Nobody wants to see cricket scores in rugby, as a spectacle it is not sustainable. With so many articles about England’s procession and lack of competition it feeds the epicaricacy of many looking for an opportunity to pounce. England are not the first team to dominate nor does it happen only in rugby, think Federer, Nadal, Red Bull or Mercedes, Manchester Utd, Australia in tests and World Cups. Instead of celebrating the achievements why find reasons to falsify it pointing towards larger playing pool, professional for a longer period or mitigate with the lack of growth in other nations. Can we not enjoy it while it is here and know that it won’t last for ever, others coveting what England have will soon take the crown, ask the aforementioned?
6 Go to commentsShame he won’t turn out for the Netherlands now they’re improving. U20s are Euro champs and in the U20 Trophy this year. The senior sides gets better every year too.
3 Go to commentsWill rugbypass tv be showing these games?
1 Go to commentsWell where do you start, the fact that England have a professional domestic league and Ireland’s is fully amatuer, that they have fully seperated professional squads at Fifteens and Sevens (7’s thinly disguised as GB), and Ireland have fully pro Sevens squad who loan some players back to the Semi-Professional Fifteens squad (moved from amateur for only a year or so) for a few games at 6N & RWC’s. The Women’s games is a shambles, and is at risk of killing itself by pushing for professionalism when the market isn’t really there to support it outside one or two countnries..
6 Go to commentsWayne Smith's input didn't have as much impact on the last final as Davison's red card for Thompson. England were 14 points up and flying when that happened.
6 Go to comments