The Chiefs Are 'Embarrassed' And 'Disappointed' Over A Scandal They Deny Actually Happened
There were a lot of nice words thrown around at the New Zealand Rugby press conference detailing their inquiry into the Chiefs’ scandal. But what did they really say? Alex Casey translates.
Today we got New Zealand Rugby’s definitive ruling on the Chiefs scandal. Last month a stripper named Scarlette alleged that while hired to perform at their Mad Monday celebrations, some of the Chiefs threw gravel at her, repeatedly touched her despite her denying consent and poured alcohol on her.
There was an apparently rigorous investigation into the events of the evening conducted by the general counsel of New Zealand Rugby – a guy who loves his job and has been on the NZR team for over a decade. Which means that one branch of New Zealand Rugby investigated another branch of New Zealand Rugby and found that everything was basically okay.
This is a little bit like Colonel Sanders being put in change of an inquiry into the 11 secret herbs and spices and pronouncing them delicious. At a press conference today three blokes delivered the verdict: everything is fine, none of it really happened and wow isn’t fried chicken the best.
There were a lot of key words thrown around today; “embarrassed” was one, “disappointed” was another, “inappropriate” was sprinkled in there to jazz things up. But there was no “sorry” – certainly none to the woman who spoke out in the first place.
Shockingly, sources have revealed that despite Scarlette herself being the origin of the allegations, she was the very last person spoken to during the investigation. Which would mean that only once they’d spoken to everyone else they possibly could, from friendly beer drinkers at the pub to striving bench players, only then did they get around to speaking to the person at the centre of this whole shitstorm.
Scarlette was, we understand, interviewed alone. Without any legal representation or support.
So with that in mind, what did The Chiefs and Rugby New Zealand actually say about what happened? Andrew Flexman admitted there had been heaps of “learnings” and I guess he’s right. At the end of the day it’s a game of two halves and the most important thing is to back the boys and four more years and chase great. Right?
Here are some key quotes from the conference and their associated learnings:
“This is a black mark”
The press conference focused almost solely on how disappointing the act of hiring a stripper was in the first place, because nobody else in New Zealand’s long history of prominent sportsmen has ever done anything like that. This type of entertainment isn’t appropriate, they said, it was a poor decision and inappropriate for a rugby team, they said. Paying for a scantily-clad woman to perform for you is bad. Not like those hot chicks who come out in booty shorts at half time, those ones are good.
The thing about these “black marks” in the sporting world is that they amazingly wash away after a good soak, and eventually it’s as if the whole thing never happened. Also, if we are going to have this much hoopla about a stripper, where’s our retrospective razzing of Richie and his mates for taking the world cup to an exclusive strip joint called Platinum Lace? No worries mate and, hey, Chasing Great out in all good cinemas now.
“The conclusions are valid and realistic”
Realistic, I take that to mean, because who could possibly believe that a large group of young men on the beers would exploit and disrespect a woman hired to dance for them on her own. The much more likely option is that the Scarlette made it up, because it’s very valid to note that women, especially those in the adult industry, are unhinged lying harlot banshees from the underworld and the boys are, well, the boys. Just look how well they kick the ball your honour, case closed.
What could Scarlette possibly have to gain from making the allegations up? Wow, just look at all the opportunities that have cropped up since! Two jobs lost, what a career boost! Meanwhile, the press conference was very focussed on the tarnished careers of these rugby players, who will have to wait until November’s pre-season before they can kick the ol’ ball around. The biggest blow to the poor guys is there being no sweet sweet My Food Bag delivery at their doorstep!
There has been a “full caution issued”
The whole team is being held accountable for the “poor decision-making”, instead of individual parties. Even the 16 players who weren’t there! Because if only one or two people were punished then that would suggest that something had actually happened, and absolutely nothing happened.
As has been observed on Twitter, The Chiefs are hugely embarrassed and disappointed about all the nothing that happened. They hope to rebuild from all the nothing to make a… something… but not before addressing all this nothing head-on.
The events were “not substantiated”
The men spoke of the “clear and unbiased account” of the witnesses involved, nine of which were independent from the Chiefs party. Having independent voices is good, so thank god the whole inquiry itself was run by New Zealand Rugby, the Chiefs’ owners. In response to her claims being unsubstantiated, Scarlette has issued this advice to women:
“My advice for all women is if you are going to attend an all-male event such as the one organised by the Chiefs, whether you are a paid worker or not, take a friend or a supporter who can make sure you are safe and who can vouch for you afterwards if needed.”
Again, we’re left to conclude the responsibility grimly falls on the woman to put the measures in place to protect her body and her testimony. Why didn’t she bring security? Why wasn’t she wearing an American flag lapel camera? Why didn’t she drag along a Justice of the Peace attached to a lie detector?
“It’s worth noting that the police haven’t taken further action”
It’s also worth noting that the police haven’t taken further action for reasons “which include consideration of her wishes”. This seems to indicate that it could have something to do with a reluctance on Scarlette’s part to submitting to our famously welcoming justice system – rather than simply a lack of evidence – which drove the Police’s decision-making.
Maybe worth noting that too?
Additional reporting: Duncan Greive
Comments on RugbyPass
I know Leinster did a job on La Roche but shortly after HT Leinster were 30-13 ahead of them and at a similar time Toulouse were trailing Exeter. At 60 mins Leinster were 27 ahead but after 67 mins Toulouse were only 19 ahead before Exeter collapsed. That’s heavier scoring by Leinster against the Champions. I think people are looking at Toulouses total a little too much. I also think Northhampton are in with a real chance, albeit I’d put Leinster as favourites. If Leinster make the final I expect them to win by more than ten and with control.
2 Go to commentsHey Nick, your match analysis is decent but the top and tail not so much, a bit more random. For a start there’s a seismic difference in regenerating any club side over a test team. EJ pretty much had to urinate with the appendage he’d been given at test level whereas club success is impacted hugely by the budget. Look no further than Boudjellal’s Toulon project for a perfect example. The set ups at La Rochelle and Leinster are like chalk and cheese and you are correct that Leinster are ahead. Leinster are not just slightly ahead though, they are light years ahead on their plans, with the next gen champions cup team already blooded, seasoned and developing at speed from their time manning the fort in the URC while the cream play CC and tests. They have engineered a strong talent conveyor belt into their system, supported by private money funnelled into a couple of Leinster private schools. The really smart move from Leinster and the IRFU however is maximising the Irish Revenue tax breaks (tax relief on the best 10 years earnings refunded at retirement) to help keep all of their stars in Ireland and happy, while simultaneously funding marquee players consistently. And of course Barrett is the latest example. But in no way is he a “replacement for Henshaw”, he’s only there for one season!!! As for Rob Baxter, the best advice you can give him is to start lobbying Parliament and HMRC for a similar state subsidy, but don’t hold your breath… One thing Cullen has been very smart with is his coaching team. Very quickly he realised his need to supplement his skills, there was talk of him exiting after his first couple of years but he was extremely shrewd bringing in Lancaster and now Nienaber. That has worked superbly and added a layer that really has made a tangible difference. Apart from that you were bang on the money… 😉😂
2 Go to commentsNot sure exactly what went wrong for him at Glasgow but it’s pretty clear he ain’t Franco’s cup of tea. Suspect he would have been better served heading out of Scotland around the same time as Finn, Hoggy and Jonny!
1 Go to commentsBulls disrespected the Northampton supporters and the competition. Decide quickly, fully in or out.
24 Go to commentsI wonder if Parling was ever on England’s radar as a coach? Obviously Borthwick is a great lineout coach, but I do worry he might be taking on too much as both head coach and forwards coach.
1 Go to commentsJason Jenkins has one cap. When Etzebeth was his age he had over 80 caps. Experience matters. He will never amount to what Etzebeth has because he hasn’t been developed as an international player.
2 Go to commentsSays much about the player picking this gig over the easier and bigger rewards offered to him in Japan. Also says a lot about the state sanctioned tax benefits the Irish Revenue offers pro rugby players, with their ten highest earning years subject to an additional 40% tax relief and paid as a lump sum, in cash, at retirement. Certainly helps Leinster line up the financial ducks in a row to fund marquee signings like this!!! No other union anywhere in world rugby benefits from this kind of lucrative financial sponsorship from their government…
5 Go to commentsTrue Jordie could earn a lot more in Japan. But by choosing Leinster he’ll be playing with 1 of the best clubs in the world and can win a champions cup and URC…..
6 Go to commentsThanks for that Marshy, noticed you didn't say who is gonna win it. We know who ain't gonna win it - your Crusaders outfit. They've gone from having arguably the best Super Rugby first five ever, to having a clutch of rookies. Hurricanes all the way!
1 Go to commentsGeez you really have to question the NRLs ability to produce players of quality. Its pathetic. Dont the 25mil in Aus produce enough quality womens players. Sad.
1 Go to commentsBulls fan here, and agree 100% with the conclusion (and little else) of this article. SA sides should absolutely f-off from the champs cup until we get fair scheduling, equal support for travel arrangements and home semis. You know, like all the european teams get.
24 Go to commentsI’m yet to see why Grace would be an ABs contender. He’s pedestrian and lacks the dominance required of a top flight 8.
11 Go to commentsGee my Highlanders were terrible. They have gone backwards since the start of the season. The trouble began when we left Millar behind to prep as the 10 against the Brumbies and he was disconnected from the team that came back from Aussie. We rested Patchell for that game and we blew an avalanche of ball in good attacking positions in the 1st half. Against the Rebels we seem to of gone into a pod system with forwards hanging off from the breakdown leaving Fakatava to secure our ball!
80 Go to commentsPot Kettle, the English and French teams have done it for years.
24 Go to commentsHas virtually played every minute of previous games. Back row of Li Lo Willie , Grace and Blackadder would be the 1. Crusaders issue is a very average 1st 5 who cannot run. Kicking in general play is also below par They need to put Yong Kemara in. He must have so.e talent for them to bring him down from Waikato. Hoehepa would struggle to play in so.e club sided
11 Go to commentsI hope this a good thing making all these changes!
3 Go to commentsThe Hurricanes are good, especially with a decent coach now. However, let’s be real, the Crusaders and Chiefs are clearly a good degree weaker without the players they’ve lost overseas now. The Canes lost one player. It’s also why the aussie teams ‘seem’ to be stronger.
9 Go to commentsOr you could develop your own players instead of constantly taking from the SH competition and weakening it in the process? With all the player and financial resources these unions have compared to SH countries you’d think they could manage that, or is weakening the SH comps and their national sides an added bonus? Probably.
3 Go to commentsNot so fast Aaron, we might need you in black yet lol. God knows he’d be a lot less nerve-racking than hot and (very) cold players like Perofeta. It’s really a shame Reuben Love isn’t playing 10, we’ve got enough 15 options.
4 Go to commentsAnd those from the NH still seem to be puzzled (and delighted) why NZ’s depth isn’t what it once was. Over 600 NZ players overseas, that’s insane. This sort of deal is why Super Rugby coaches have admitted they struggle now to find enough quality to fill out their squads.
6 Go to comments